My Story…

Tuesday August 23^rd I started a new life as I officially accepted Jesus into my life and got saved! This is my story…

 

I grew up in the suburbs of Chicago in a religious Catholic family with parents who were great role models. They loved us unconditionally, taught us hard lessons and raised us in the church and around Godly people. My family and I went to church on Sunday’s, I attend CCD class during the week, served as an Altar Boy until 7^th grade and earned all of the Catholic milestones along the way (Baptized as an infant, First Communion and Reconciliation). However, looking back I may have been religious at a young age but I definitely hadn’t accepted Jesus into my life. As my siblings and I grew older and became more involved in sports and more and more problems seemed to arise in Catholic Churches throughout the country my family’s attendance began to falter. By the time I was in high school, college and graduate school the only time you would see me in Church was Christmas and Easter. Quite honestly, that was only part of it. During those years, I prayed before games and when I needed help but that was about it. God had become a crutch I leaned on only when I needed it. I knew He was out there but He really wasn’t a focal part of my life.

 

Then, I starting dating my now wife and eventually met her family. They were a strong Christian family who put nothing before God. When I met the Waddell’s my first thought was, “Wow, they are awesome people!” My second thought was, “Man, I don’t know how they can live like that.” To me, it seemed like they NEVER had one negative thought or committed one sinful action. Me, on the other hand, well, let’s just say I needed a lot of work. Furthermore, they went to church on Wednesday, twice on Sunday and taught Sunday school. At the time, that was about the extent of my attendance at church throughout an entire year. As Brooke and I grew closer and closer, so did my relationship with her parents and ultimately God. I started going to church again every Sunday, opening up my Bible here and there and praying more frequently. But still, I had a long way to go. Deep down in my heart I hadn’t fully accepted God into my life. How could I? It seemed so hard. The time commitment to learn and change some of my behaviors seemed impossible. Can’t cuss? How could I do that while in coaching? No drinking? What’s wrong with having a couple of beers on a Friday or Saturday night? Read the bible and pray? How in the world was I going to do that with all the things I had on my plate? Better yet, where do I even start? I knew some of the major Bible stories but that was it. Ask me where the book of John was or what tithing was and I’d look at you as though you were speaking Japanese!

 

With that said, my relationship with God was improving. When I got married to my wife I promised her and her father (which wasn’t hard to do considering he was holding a shot gun…no joke) I would continue to seek God. I was improving and learning more about the powers of God by attending Brooke’s home church in Greeneville and Sevier Heights Church here in Knoxville but still, deep down, I hadn’t made the ultimate leap of faith. I was changing on the outside and becoming a religious person but on the inside I was still questioning many things and thus truly not a faithful Godly man.

Then my life was flipped upside down. Married with a 6 month old daughter, I was fired from my job. I didn’t know what to do. How was I going to provide for the two loves of my life? Was I going to have to get out of the profession that I loved? Were we going to have to move? These were just a few of the million stressful questions that constantly ran through my head. Sure I was pressing on, doing whatever I could to try to find a job, but on the inside I was torn up. Until, finally on April 24^th, with tears running down my face while listening to Pastor Rudd at my in-laws church in Greeneville, I prayed to God fully committing myself to Him, desperately laying it all on Him. I needed Him. I needed His guidance. I needed His wisdom. I needed His love. I was hurting and as hard as it was for me to admit, I couldn’t do it myself.  Honestly, I needed anything He could give me.

I’ll never forget the difference I felt inside of me walking out of church on that Sunday, having accepted Jesus into my heart.

From that day on I tried to dive deeper into my Bible, consistently pray and ultimately making some character changes. However, because I’m the type of person who likes to try and figure everything out myself, this huge task began to really frustrate me. I didn’t know really where to start. When it came to the Bible and everything about the Church, I was similar to a 3^rd grader. Noah’s Ark? Yeah, I remember hearing about it when I was a kid and at church a couple of times but that’s about it. I was so confused. However, I know God knew I was trying as He blessed me in so many ways during this time such as answering my deepest prayers when I got rehired at the University of Tennessee. His many blessings and the comfort and friendship His relationship had provided me had only reaffirmed my commitment to Him. However, my frustration continued to grow because of my lack of Christian knowledge. I wasn’t improving as much as I wanted to. I knew I had accepted Jesus into my life but I wanted to become a better Christian husband, father, friend and Coach. I wanted to gather the knowledge necessary to be able to spread His word amongst all of those around me.

I finally let go of my stubbornness  (momentarily) and contacted our Team Chaplain, Roger “Chap” Woods, and Executive Pastor at Sevier Heights, Greg Williams, and asked them to begin doing a bible study with me. As we began meeting, I told Chap my story and he was thrilled to hear all about my journey and genuinely proud of the decision I had made. Before we moved any further during our meeting on August 23^rd he asked if I had ever read the Sinners Prayer? To which I responded “No. Honestly, I don’t even know what that is.” (Once again showing my adolescent knowledge of the Christian life) After Chap explained it I said, “Let’s do it!” So, at 8:23 AM on August 23^rd I OFFICIALLY ACCEPTED JESUS CHRIST AS MY LORD AND SAVIOR!

I am so thankful that God has put Greg and Chap into my life!  Through my Bible studies with them, attending small groups at Sevier Heights and studying and praying at home I have grown SO much over the last month and a half. Do I have a long ways to go? ABSOLUTELY. But, now that I have God in my heart and Godly people around me, I know I can do anything as Matthew 6: 33-34 states, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.” I look forward to making a positive impact on those around me in the future as a Godly husband, father, friend and Coach! Thanks be to God!

 

NOTE: A special thanks goes out to my parents for putting God in my heart at an early age, my wife, her family and their community for showing me that it is ok to love God and have him in your heart, and to my friends of Sevier Heights for being Godly role models to me. I can’t wait to keep learning and improving! Thank you!

 

At a Crossroads

Despite my nerves heading to the Final Four, in my heart of hearts, I had really high aspirations. However, walking into the hotel lobby FULL of coaches was like walking into a Mike Tyson right-handed hook in the first minute of the fight (pre-tattooed face days of course). It didn’t knock me out, but it instantly put me in check and woke me up. Getting an interview and finding a job was going to be a lot tougher then I thought. There were young, and old, employed and unemployed, high school and AAU, and Division I to Division III coaches all looking for jobs. It didn’t matter if guys had a good job or not, it seemed everybody was trying to move. How in the world was I going to get noticed?

For starters, I rocked my University of Tennessee basketball shirts all weekend. As you would expect this got a lot of looks and questions. Comments such as “Why would you wear that, they just fired you?” or “You don’t work there anymore” were continuously thrown my way. Comments such as those were exactly what I was going for as the “Power T” broke the ice and enabled me to explain my story to potential employers and colleagues. I am darn proud of all that we accomplished at Tennessee and have nothing to be ashamed of during my tenure there.

I finally landed a couple of interviews on Friday after a lot of time networking on Thursday and with the huge help of some great references. Surprise, surprise, I was nervous but confident. Nervous because I need to find a job for my family but confident because I was just going to be me. The interviews really weren’t that difficult. Sure they asked some challenging questions but because I answered them with complete honesty based on my experiences and character, it was easy. I mean let’s face it, we’re talking about basketball not rocket science. I’m really excited about these potential opportunities and honestly couldn’t be happier with how the interviews went!

One thing that has become more apparent to me in the last few weeks has been the importance of family. My wife, our families and friends have been unbelievably supportive. Same needs to be said about my coaching family. Coach Forbes, Jones, Shay, Fancher, Jeter (my former Coach at UWM for 1 year), Dean Lockwood and even Coach Pearl at times have been great to me. Whether it was taking time out of their hectic schedules to make a phone call for me or give their advice, they have been so good to me and I am so thankful. After leaving my interviews, it seems as though my biggest competition are guys from the new head coaches “coaching tree.”

Coaches, for the most part, are very loyal guys. They really like to hire within their coaching family. Unfortunately, Coach Pearl doesn’t have the most extensive coaching tree out there so although this makes things a little tougher I’m positive that based on the references from those above and the things I stand for, my opportunity will come somewhere.

The big question for me is where will that somewhere be. Two short years ago, as a single guy I’d have gone anywhere for any amount of money. I just wanted to coach. But now, with a wife and a daughter, things have changed. It’s no longer me it’s we. I talked to a lot of different people this week. Some I admire because of what they stand for, some I don’t. Some people I talked to coach because like myself love the game and want to help kids improve and become men while others have a different, more self-serving agenda. As we’ve seen in the media lately, there is an awesome and an ugly side to collegiate athletics but that’s everywhere and in every kind of business right?

Coaching, the more I’m around it, the crazier it seems to get. For every amazing story of accomplishment there seems to be a horror story. For every perceived fluffy story such as Butler’s Brad Steven’s there’s a deeper behind-the-scenes story such as the one a veteran coach of 26 years told me this weekend. The story consisted of 26 years of high stress, 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night, moving place to place, cheating amongst colleagues, lost time and missed experiences with family members, lack of loyalty in the business, problems with players/parents, addiction to sleeping pills and the thought of never being good enough because there truly is only one team that ends the season happy and satisfied each year. This was from a head coach who had made it to the highest level of college basketball, won championships and cashed a big paycheck for many years. The recollection may have been the extreme negative side of coaching as things such as seeing your player’s graduate, become better men, winning games, calling coaching basketball a job and making positive differences in the community were left out but when you throw that crap in above, is it worth it?

I strongly believe that coaching doesn’t have to consist of all that negativity but honestly though, the more I think about it, you can’t hide from a lot of that stuff. I’m confident I will always be a Godly man, a family man and a man who tries to make a positive difference in those around me but do I really want to go through the next 30 years of my life dealing with ALL the coaching profession will throw at me? More importantly, do I want to put my family through it?

So although I knew I’d be sitting here taking this flight back to Knoxville today from the Final Four, mentally I’m actually in a completely different place. With my heart in coaching I thought I’d be sitting here thinking about different coaching job options but now, for the first time ever, despite my deep love for coaching, I’m thinking about different professions. This is normal right? I mean what if I don’t get a job offer in coaching? I have to evaluate everything don’t I? What would I do besides coach considering I don’t have any job offers in the “real world” either? I’m at a critical point in my life but I’m confident things will become clearer throughout the coming days through hours of praying, soul searching, talking and as job offers come or…don’t come.

Thanks for reading!

Final Four

Houston, I have a problem. I’m unemployed and need to find a job, so here I come! Tomorrow at 6 a.m. I fly to Houston to catch up with friends, network and hand out my resume to the tons and tons of coaches in town for the Final Four festivities.

Honestly, I’m a little nervous but also extremely excited for this potentially life-changing weekend. It will be tough but I’m ready. In preparation I have spent hours upon hours working on my personal profile and resume, sending out numerous emails and reaching out with phone calls to colleagues and mentors. The responses I have gotten thus far have been great but yet frustrating at the same time. Almost every person I have talked to has said nothing but good things about me and 99.9% of the time finish our conversation with something along the lines of “you don’t have anything to worry about Mark, you’ll land on your feet.” Really? How in the world do you know that? I try to be a person of integrity, work hard and treat people the right way but how in the world does everybody know that I’m going to be a great coach one day? That time seems SOOO far away. I just want an opportunity tomorrow!

What goes on at the Final Four? This five-day event, attended by the majority of college basketball’s current, former and unemployed coaches, numerous media outlets and tons of basketball vendors from all divisions of the NCAA, is packed. Most coaches arrive on Wednesday and leave on Sunday prior to Monday’s national championship game so that they can get back to campus for the following week’s workouts with their teams. During the day the majority of the coaches and media personalities get together with old buddies, network with new ones, look back on their seasons and attend the open practices, clinic’s, meetings and trade shows. In addition, a lot of coaches, especially those that are seeking a job, hang out in the host hotel lobby during their down time hoping to shake a hand and pass a resume along to as many potential bosses as possible. For younger guys in the business like me, sometimes you need help getting introduced to coaches so this is where your friends in the business really help a lot. Not all coaches are willing to help other coaches but I am so thankful for those who have been willing to put in a good word for me to a coach they know. Without them, I would have nothing.

At night, many of the major college basketball sponsors (Adidas and Nike), media outlets (CBS and ESPN) and basketball groups (Rising Coaches Elite and Sportstec) have parties for members of the schools they sponsor. These, my friends, are BIG TIME.

With that said, I am praying people give me the opportunity to meet with them to give them a better insight of what I stand for. My loyalty will only be to one man, God, and the character and morals he and my parents have instilled in me. I am eager to show people the reason I coach is to make a positive difference in the lives of the student-athlete, to help them grow as men first, basketball players second and to do what is necessary to help the head coach and his program achieve their goals. That’s it. It’s not talk. It’s fact. Given an opportunity, I am confident my work ethic, passion and skill set will be an asset to any program.

Wherever this job search leads me, I know one thing: God has blessed me in so many ways. The love and support I have around me is tremendous and I am so very thankful for that.

It’s crazy to think I’ve only been without a job for a little over a week because it seems like it’s been forever. However, I continue to learn a lot through out this process that I know will help me in the future. Now however, with making my family proud and achieving my goals as my motivation, it’s time to go find a job.

Thanks for reading!!

Thing’s I’ve Learned

The last few days have been really tough. The sadness seeps in not so much when thoughts of “what am I going to do for a job” come into my head but more so when I think about my wife, who was born and raised in East Tennessee, our 5 month old daughter and leaving so many great friends. My family and friends are whom I work to make proud every day. It’s honestly them I look up to. But now, my wife is looking to me with wide, curious, nervous eyes asking what’s next? I can’t answer that yet. One thing I do know is I’m not just sitting still.

The son of a father who’s a former college basketball player, current medical sales rep and a hall of fame high school volleyball coach, my family was raised to be competitive doers. The word “can’t” — no joke — was not allowed in my house growing up. I can still hear my dad today saying, “We don’t say that word.” So, I’ve taken the approach that with every ending there is a new beginning. I’ve been on the phone, computer and setting up meetings at the Final 4 to try and find something new. I strongly believe those who wait around for something good to happen to them, blame others, or feel sorry for themselves during tough times will get left in the dust. This entire situation has forced me into a new journey. But I can guarantee you, I’ll find a way to reach my goals, somehow, some way at God’s speed.

Although miserable at times because I feel as though I should always be doing something, this experience is teaching me a lot. It has already taught me that there truly are tons of great people out there. Your supportive emails, tweets and blog comments I could never accurately communicate to you how much they have meant to me. In addition, the messages from so many former players such as Chris Lofton, Wayne Chism, Jordan Howell and Dane Bradshaw to former walk-ons Quinn Cannington and Tanner Wild, have been the best! However, the biggest blessing of all this has been the extra time I’ve gotten to spend with my wife and daughter. My wife accurately joked with me the other day that I’ve been around more the last week then I have been throughout an entire month of the season.

During this time off I have learned a few other things as well. The following is a list of these things:

1.     I like hearing my daughter cry just as much as I like hearing players cry and complain…I can’t stand it

2.     Do not blast your music in your head phones while your daughter is in child care at the gym because if she start’s crying and your name is called over the intercom to come get her you definitely wont be able to hear. (Yes, I’m an idiot.)

3.     The coaching fraternity is a tight group. You need as many friends and supporters as possible in this business.

4.     Feeding your daughter is not as easy as it sounds. My daughter grabbed her bowl of cereal and then rubbed it on her face Wednesday morning.

5.     Sweetened condensed milk, contrary to my belief, is not in the milk section of the grocery store. I guess that is what happens when I pick up the things on our grocery list.

6.     Babies really do sleep a lot and I am jealous they get to wear “onesies” all day every day

7.     This is the first time in my life I have not had something basketball related going on between 2:30-6:00pm for a couple days in a row since, ummmm, grade school???

8.     I can and will start going to watch AAU events, visiting coaches at practice and working out player’s since I am not currently employed by an NCAA institution.

9.     Just because of the amount we got back on our tax returns yesterday, I suggest getting married and having a baby every year!

10. Pandora’s Disney station is awesome and “Hakuna Matata” is probably the best Disney song ever.

In addition to learning these things I have been vigorously working on my resume and contacting different places at all levels with potential coaching openings. I will leave Thursday for the Final Four in Houston with my principles and coaching philosophies in my head, my resume in hand and my fingers crossed, eager for an opportunity. I don’t wish things to happen, I work to make them happen so hopefully this work will all pay off soon.

Thanks for reading!

Thank You Vol Nation

As I sit here, my office completely empty and my car packed full with all my hard work, I don’t know what to say or let alone do. I spent so much time in these offices. I met my wife here. I had my first child here. I got my master’s degree here. Coach Pearl and this great university gave me my first opportunity in the coaching profession, and I am forever grateful for that.

I grew up in Schaumburg, Illinois (20 minutes outside of Chicago), so SEC athletics were foreign to me. Sure, I knew about Phillip Fulmer, Tennessee football and Kentucky basketball, but that was about it. When I packed up my dad’s ugly teal minivan and moved down here, just eight days after Coach Pearl offered me a graduate assistant position, I had no clue the next five years of my life would be this much of a blessing.

I’ll never forget my first football weekend here. We were playing highly ranked Cal on an absolutely beautiful opening weekend. As our staff did on numerous home football weekends, we had a large number of recruits on campus that day. As the Vol Walk approached, we all began making our way toward the stadium. Mind you, this was not only my first college football game ever, it was my first as a UT staff member who was supposed to be talking it up with recruits and their parents about all the festivities taking place all around them.  With the sun gleaming and people tailgating in orange and white everywhere,  I was absolutely speechless! It was the coolest thing I had ever seen. I couldn’t believe all the people and the excitement they had for the start of a new football season. Right then and there, I was hooked.

As sappy as it sounds, I fell in love with the University of Tennessee.

Since that day, this university, the people within it and the supporters around it have been nothing but great to me. I have experienced college athletics at the highest level and have been witness to one of the best—if not THE best—fan bases in the country. I have been blessed to be a part of the highest of highs that this program has ever seen.  Chris Lofton’s shot over Durant to beat Texas. The #1 vs. #2 showdown vs. Memphis. Advancing to the Elite Eight. The list of big wins could go on forever but it’s the relationships with the players and the passion of the fans that I will remember most. These last five years have been special, have taught me a ton and have made me not only a better coach but a better person. This may be the end for me here, but with every ending there comes a new beginning, and there is no doubt that whatever my future entails, I will continue to work my hardest to make a positive difference in the lives of those around me. I will succeed!!

No matter where I go, no matter who I coach, I will always remember how great it is to be a Tennessee Vol!

Season Over

Six straight NCAA Tourney’s, two SEC championships, two Sweet Sixteen’s, an Elite Eight appearance, the #1 National ranking, players graduating, fan support and the relationships and friendships with the players, staff members and supporters are the things that I’ve been thinking about to help me through the last 24 hours. I beam with pride when thinking about these things and the positive difference I hope I have made on this program and our players.

However, during times of adversity, you can’t just trick yourself into thinking everything is ok by making yourself feel good about things that have happened in the past. People that do, may feel better about themselves in the short term, but won’t be better off in the long run. Yesterday was brutal. This year has been tough. But like I say all the time, in every situation there are things you learn to do and things not to do. Needless to say, I have learned a lot this year and become a better person, coach and mentor to our player’s because of it. I strongly believe our program will do the same. Just like we did after losing to Oklahoma State in the first round of the NCAA tournament two seasons ago, our staff and players will work vigorously to improve so that we can go on another special run in the NCAA tournament next season. Every ending, like this season, is the start to something new and I’m excited for these new challenges and opportunities.

I personally (well, as personal as you can be through a blog) want to thank all of our fans for their support this season. Throughout my 5 years here, your passion has always been remarkable. However, Vol Nation, your unwavering support, loyalty and enthusiasm throughout this tough season truly showed me why you are the best fan base in the country. My basketball family and I truly thank you!

GO VOLS!!

Tourney Time!

NCAA Tournament here we come! After all we’ve been through, were right where we thought we would be…in the NCAA Tournament. A tournament that you can’t win unless you’re in. Are we happy with where we’re at? How can we not be? With a lot of very good teams left out of the tournament, we are thrilled to be playing in our 6^th straight NCAA Tournament with the chance to shock the world as we survive and advance.

Our first test is the 8th seeded Michigan Wolverine’s and that test is no home ec 101 course. Coach Belien’s system is as complex as geometry. Their great spacing, hard cuts and numerous reads by their great shooting guards and small forwards make their offense difficult to cover for even their conference opponents who are familiar with their style. We on the other hand, will have had four days to learn their system and prepare our players. It is definitely the biggest challenge I have had while being in the NCAA tournament. To say we weren’t absolutely thrilled to have a Friday game and get that extra day to be prepared would be an understatement.

There are numerous things that we have stressed over the last few days but none as important or as simple then staying in stance. If we relax for even a second, we will be lost and they could embarrass us. So, here’s what I like to say; Stay in stance or get in your warm up pants…aka, if you get out of stance, your coming out of the game. As complicated as their offensive system is our main goal as a staff was to simplify what they do and communicate it to our players. Imagine guarding a Dane Bradshaw (good size, great play maker, non shooter) at the point, a Chris Lofton (great catch and shoot guy) at the 2, a JaJuan Smith (deadly shooter and very good slasher) at the 3, a junior year Ryan Childress (great shooter and very tough) at the 4 and a Brian Williams (screen and roller, opportunistic scorer and good rebounder) at the 5. Ummm ya, that group would not be fun to cover. There is no way to go over every action that they run but once the game gets going we must trust and all the work on our main defensive principles must pay off.

I strongly believe no matter how complex they may be we can not get paralyzed by over analyzing their stuff and clouding our players minds. Basketball is a game of instinct. If our players begin to think too much, we will then be put at a disadvantage. Sure we’ll do a couple different things but we most of all we must go to our strengths. I think sometimes once the NCAA tournament gets going some teams steer away from what got them there as they try to adjust to a particular opponent. We can’t do thatWe need to do what we do, be the aggressor and make Michigan adjust to us. How will they score against our length? How will their four-guard line up and undersized post defend Tobias, Jerrone, Brian, Kenny and John? That’s what makes games so exciting (and coaching so stressful). Hopefully, we are the one’s playing chess while their playing checkers so we can continue to build on our six year winning tradition.

GO VOLS!!